Wednesday, February 1, 2017

For The Sake of Arguing

                                                           



Welcome to the February edition of  The Insecure Writer's Support Group. Be sure to visit our host Alex J. Cavanaugh, as well as the other talented and supportive writers.
                                                                  
                                                     For The Sake of Arguing

The phone rang just as I was about to leave the house.
Mom: It's raining hard now, so you don't have to take me to physical therapy.
Me: But it was raining earlier.
Mom: Yes, but I'll just cancel my appointment. That way you won't get wet.
Me: You weren't worried about that before. I told you I don't mind. Besides, I made you lunch, and didn't you want to go shopping first?
Mom: Yes, but it's too much trouble going back and forth in the rain.
Me: It's not coming down as hard now, and don't you think you need the therapy to get stronger?
Mom: Well if it's not too much trouble.

Later that afternoon my mom told me that I really should be more patient.

This made me think about other ridiculous arguments I've had throughout the years. Shortly after I started driver's ed, my dad suggested that I drive to work. As I was pulling out of the driveway, my mom came home. She hopped in the back seat, while my dad sat by my side. All was calm, until I had to make a left turn without an arrow. My dad was telling me to be assertive and speed up before the light changed, while my mom was telling me to slow down. Instead, I got so nervous that I backed out of the intersection and waited for the next light. Needless to say, neither of my parents volunteered to take me driving again. 

The summer my younger son turned thirteen was during travel baseball season, so we decided to have a little celebration after the game. We ordered pizzas, and brought a cooler filled with soft drinks for the team. Earlier that evening I asked my husband to pick up a few bags of ice for the cooler at McDonald's. He asked me how much it would cost. I told him 99 cents a bag. Then he wanted to know how much other places in the area were charging to make sure that was the best price. I assured him that 99 cents was the best rate in the Chicagoland area, and that if he wanted to miss his son's birthday to scout for 97 cent bags of ice in Wisconsin, I'm sure he would understand. Of course, he still had to make some calls just in case there was a fire sale on ice at the end of July.  It took me a long time to thaw out from that whole experience.

After all these years, my mother still puts her foot on the imaginary passenger side brake whenever I make a left turn. As for my purchasing power, I'm in charge of finding the best deals on cars and the occasional travel destination, but I never go further than my freezer for ice.


*Note: This is a re-post from November 2011.

21 comments:

  1. I'm sure we can all remember those kind of arguments that we wish we didn't have. Funny about your husband and the ice. Sounds like how my husband used to be too.

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  2. Is it worth the time and gas just to save a few cents on ice? Nope. I'd get it at the closest location no matter what the price.

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  3. Goodness, I think patience is the hardest lesson to learn in this life. Even when you think you have it, you have more distance to go. It's one of those ongoing lessons--not only patience with others or circumstances, but patience with ourselves.

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  4. Hi Julie - love your mother and your hubby - strange creatures men sometimes in their demands for that extra cent or penny ... time is what I value. Gosh I was lucky with my mother and uncle - who were just grateful for what I did and really didn't question - I did get their viewpoints though ... I'm not that bad a tartar!

    I can't stand ice -so I have to shop for it if someone comes to stay ... thankfully I only had one parent teach me to drive ...

    Cheers Hilary

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  5. GEM JULIE ~
    Backing out of the intersection to wait for the next light -- HILARIOUS! I really laughed out loud. And I did so again in reading the story about the fire sale on ice in July.

    I don't blame your husband though. .99 cents for a bag of ice is OUTRAGEOUS! Heck, it's only frozen water, and would anyone pay .99 cents for a bottle of wat-- er... never mind.

    ~ D-FensDogG
    Check out my new blog @
    (Link:] Stephen T. McCarthy Reviews...

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  6. Your driving experience reminds me a little of what my sister did to me. I didn't drive for MANY years after that. I was too terrified.

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  7. My daughter had favorites when practicing her driving. Me if I hadn't yelled in our last outing, or hubby if he didn't make her too nervous. My favorite was for hubby to go with her because her driving made my heart rate (and blodd pressure) go up.

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  8. Ahhh that conversation you had with your mom reminds me of my mom and me. It felt like going around in circles and I just couldn't get why there was that run around.

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  9. Natalie - It is funny how sometimes it's the slightest things that drive people crazy! Sadly, I'm like that too, sometimes. Thanks Natalie!

    Alex - Once again you are absolutely correct! We still laugh at the ice story and fortunately my husband joins in! Thanks for hosting another wonderful IWSG, Alex!

    Crystal - So true about patience. I find that my work requires a lot of patience, and I try to remember that in everything I do. But I know I could do better. Thanks Crystal!

    Hi Hilary! No you are definitely not a "bad tartar" at all! It's nice that your mom and uncle always appreciated your efforts. No wonder you turned out to be such a warm and caring person. They were right to be proud of you! Thanks Hilary!

    Stephen - I guarantee you would not have been laughing if you were stuck behind me in that intersection! I had to sneak away to get my driver's license and it took months before my parents let me drive passed the mall that was only a few blocks away. Thanks Stephen!

    Julie

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  10. Chrys - Sorry that your sister terrified you when you were driving. I'm sure she didn't realize the power of her actions at the time. Thanks Chrys!

    Rhonda - I always felt better when my husband took our kids driving too. Sometimes I would try to sit quietly in the backseat, but it wasn't easy. Thanks Rhonda!

    Birgit - The run around is because once they got to a certain age they decided that they didn't want to be "a bother," but all of the arguing is worse than whatever we were going to do in the first place. Thanks Birgit!

    Julie

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  11. My mother frequently recited a poem: "Patience is a virtue; Keep it if you can. Seldom found in women, and never found in men." The funniest thing? She had zero patience. I have too much of it for my own good.

    I vaguely remember reading this post before, but it was well worth a repeat. Funny then, and still funny now.

    I hope all is well with you. Take care, and keep smiling.

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  12. Hi Susan! I agree that you are extremely patient! I witnessed it firsthand when we compiled Old Broads Waxing Poetic! Not only did you submit wonderful poems,you helped recruit the talent, the cover art and patiently guided me every step of the way. I'll always be grateful to you. Take care of yourself, too!

    Julie

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  13. Those kinds of arguments we all have are silly, but they can sure get under the skin at the same time. Sometimes it's hard to let go of how annoyed you feel afterwards. Your driving lesson made me smile, but I imagine it was quite nerve wracking for you at the time. :)

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    1. Connie - It was pretty nerve wracking! Fortunately, my best friend who got me the job usually drove me to work, and my parents filled in when she couldn't. I never drove together with my parents again. The older I get, the more I appreciate the story. Thanks Connie!

      Julie

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  14. I think I missed this post the first time around. The ice story could be about one of our friends. He's just like that. I'm so not. I'd pay $1.05 for convenience. Which makes my husband crazy, LOL!

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  15. Even if you do find 97 cent ice, you have to factor in the cost of gas to get there if it's further away. Also, the time you wasted calculating all of this. In the end, I'm pretty sure the 99 cent bag of ice is cheapest just based on the fact that you didn't waste precious hours trying to find something a few cents cheaper.

    My mom also likes to stomp the imaginary passenger brakes when I'm driving, even after all these years. So... am I being told that she'll probably never grow out of that?

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  16. Sometimes I wonder how an argument like this starts and why I let myself get in it. :D

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  17. Carol - Yes even $1.05 would've been a good deal! I need to check what the going rate for a bag of ice is now. Thanks Carol!

    Bryan & Brandon - I really miss you guys and I'm so sorry that I haven't come around lately. Glad we're on the same page about the ice issue. As for the imaginary brake, my mom can't stomp as well as she used to, but she still manages to yell, "Go! Go!" whenever I have to make a left hand turn without a stoplight. Thanks for making my day B & B, and I'll check out A Beer For The Shower over the weekend!

    Lux - You are absolutely right! It's ridiculous how much time is wasted over silly arguments. Thanks Lux!

    Julie

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  18. I can understand how infinite patience would be necessary in moments like these. I'm not a patient person. Better you than me, Julie.

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    1. Hi Robyn, I'm sorry that I didn't see this before. I don't think you give yourself enough credit. As a social worker you have to have an incredible amount of patience. I know that like anything else, I have to keep working on mine. Thanks Robyn!

      Julie

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